Fidel Castro: best sports journalist ever

Do you know what the black ring in the Olympics’ symbol represents? If you said corruption, you’re wrong — but you should be…

Do you know what the black ring in the Olympics’ symbol represents?

If you said corruption, you’re wrong — but you should be right! Black is such a good colour for corruption.

The world of taekwondo witnessed a terrible injustice last week as the Olympic Games in China headed into its final days.

Cuba’s Angel Matos — a gold medaller in the 2000 games — was up 3-2 during the bronze match in the 80-kilogram division against Kazakhstan’s Arman Chilmanov when the medal was contemptibly handed over on a dubious call.

After suffering an injury to his foot, Matos took a one-minute injury time-out. Having barely exceeded the allotted time, he was disqualified.

“To me it was obvious he was unable to continue,” Chilmanov told the Associated Press. “His toe on his left foot was broken.”

However, Matos proved Chilmanov an idiot when — despite a “broken” toe — Matos managed to kick the referee, Chakir Chelbat, in the head, thereby explaining in the quickest possible fashion that he respectively disagreed with his decision.

Among the ensuing media chaos, there was one journalist willing to tell the truth of the matter: Fidel Castro.

The intrepid journo didn’t buy the slop given by the media, the Olympic committee or the video clip. He dug right to the root of the issue.

“They had tried to buy his own coach,” Castro wrote in an essay published in Cuba’s state run paper, describing the injustice done to Matos. “He could not contain himself.”

Castro explained that people from an unspecified nation or group unsuccessfully attempted to bribe Matos’ coach, Leudis Gonzalez. According to Castro, they did, however, bribe a referee or two. (You know those sketchy Kazakhs: always trying to steal medals in taekwondo.)

The former Cuban president backed Matos’ decision to kick the ref in the face (after pushing him and a judge and later spitting on the ring) pointing out that there’s a “Mafia” present in the Olympic committee.

“I do not have to remain silent in the face of a mafia,” Castro wrote. Which is true; if the CIA can’t wipe Castro out, what’s the Olympics Mafia going to do?

Matos’ coach has said that — in what some might consider a bit of an overkill — not only were the judges bribed, the Kazakhs also attempted to bribe him.

Granted, it’s tempting to ask why Gonzalez waited until after being disqualified to claim the match was fixed — or allowed Matos to compete in it at all?

Or how did Matos get up 3-2 in the match or make it to the bronze match in the first place? Or how Cuba still won a silver in the women’s under 49-kilogram contest?

Well, let me tell you, those are the sort of questions asked by someone who hasn’t been kick in the head! So there.

Furthermore, we can’t blame Matos because he did exactly what he has trained to do. According to an International Taekwondo Federation website, “A serious student of taekwondo will, at all times, be modest and honest.

“If confronted with injustice, he will deal with the belligerent without any fear or hesitation at all, with indomitable spirit, regardless of whosoever and however many the number may be.”

And what better place to stick it to a communist nation like Cuba than China? Those anti-commies over there in Red China (“Red” for love, of course) are obviously jealous of Cuba’s intimate relationship with the US.

But China — or whoever pulled this off — did not act alone. No. To accomplish this injustice they needed to solicit the help of the historically biased nation of Sweden, the rightfully kicked referee’s home country.

Some people might say that Castro is biased. Sure, he ran Cuba for a bit, but hello, he’s not in charge anymore! His little brother is.

Turning to the aftermath, Matos and his coach have now received a lifetime ban from the sport.

Sure, the stitches may help heal Chelbat’s lip — which apparently required sewing according to “doctors” — but what will cure the nightmares caused by his flagrant judgment that must keep him up at nights like his throbbing mouth?

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