This year, they might actually do it.
Your Outside friends and family, who normally talk about your comfy Whitehorse home as if it were a research shack anchored on a rocky ledge against the katabatic winds of Mount Logan, might actually visit.
The Great Patriotic Travel Boycott means they can’t get bad Canadian Speedo sunburns in Florida. Dad can’t put the kids in a rental car and drive them to five different Civil War battlefields in one day. Losing the kids’ college money in Vegas is off-limits. The Americans will have to have panic attacks by themselves on Space Mountain this year.
People suffering Toronto’s muggy summer get desperate. Desperate enough to remember your eggnog-fueled offer at Thanksgiving ten years ago to give them a bucket-list experience in the Yukon.
The first steps are obvious: either pretend your research shack’s satellite is down and you never got their text, or tell them to take advantage of Air North’s connector fare and to bring their summer down jacket.
After that, it gets trickier. The traditional thing Yukoners do to show off the Yukon to guests — take them to Skagway — is off-limits.
You also have your self-respect to maintain. If you are the wacky Yukon relative who lives on an alpine ledge, you can’t just take the cousins to Qwanlin Mall for the afternoon and then Boston Pizza for dinner.
It’s especially tricky if you have only been the wacky Yukon relative for a couple of years. You might be curious yourself where those people in Coast Mountain buying the packrafts or satellite distress beacons are going.
So here are a few ideas for Yukon trips your Outside friends and families will indeed end up talking about for years. Some involve more risk and character building than others. It’s up to you how much you tell your Outside visitors in advance about Type 2 fun — miserable at the time but fun in retrospect.
Also, whether you tell them that the outdoor recreation Overton Window is different here. Your keen Outside hiker friends might have seen on YukonHiking.ca that Slim’s West is classified as “moderate.” They may shout questions about this as they are swept away by thigh-high raging glacial creek water at Kilometre 6.
For those most comfortable seeing the creeks, mountains and bears through binoculars from inside a truck, I recommend an ambitious road trip: a full coast-to-coast drive through Dawson and the Dempster Highway to Tuktoyaktuk. If you promise not to spend any money, you can drive first to the Pacific in Skagway before doing the 1,552 kilometre drive to Tuk.
My Klondike Gold Rush History podcast series is designed to be just long enough for a drive from Skagway to Dawson. After that, you can listen to white noise on the AM radio like in the old days.
Stop to gamble in Dawson and see the sights. Do some day hikes in Tombstone Park. Call ahead to Eagle Plains lodge and make sure your friends have to share a room with a German motorcyclist with 2 flat tires. Bring your swimsuit for the Arctic Ocean.
Actually, never mind about the swimsuit. Swimming in the Arctic Ocean should be done in either the nude or an 8-mm wetsuit.
For visitors who are adventurous but don’t want to carry big packs up large mountains, I suggest a long river trip. The more ambitious can do Whitehorse to Dawson, including the dreaded Laberge leg. The more safety and comfort conscious can put in at Minto. Everyone must be comfortable in canoes on big rivers, but if you are, then it is a truly wonderful trip. There are also reputable rental and guiding firms available.
If you’re afraid of crowds, and by that I mean seeing another family on the river, the Nisutlin and Teslin Rivers are also great options.
Floating past moose and bears, paddling through the midnight sun and camping on the perfect gravel bar is indeed bucket-list territory for Outside visitors.
If your visitors are the kind of people who do half-marathons, or think they are, then an epic Yukon hike is in order.
You could do the Canadian side of the Chilkoot. You could splash out some cash to add another bucket-list activity: Getting a floatplane to fly your group in and out of Bennett. You would then hike from Bennett to the summit, look at the country you are boycotting, then return. Your guests will love the scenery and camping at the classic spots, such as Happy Camp.
There are also a wide range of choices in and around Kluane, all with very useful trail info and digital maps available from YukonHiking.ca.
Samuel Glacer is a two- or three-day, relatively flat, 21-kilometre hike with great views of the glacier.
Along Kluane Lake, you can try Bock’s Lake or Nines Creek trails. Both involve steep but relatively straightforward hikes up into spectacular mountains. Bock’s elevation gain is over 1,000 metres. You can choose further adventures here, with lots of side trip options.
Slim’s West is also a wonderful hike for those willing to brave “moderate” conditions. The Observation Mountain day hike gives spectacular views of Kaskawulsh glacier.
If your guests really want to test themselves, try the Cottonwood. YukonHiking.ca describes it as an 82 kilometre, four- to six-day affair. The country is spectacular, but many Yukoners have their own special stories about the Cottonwood. It has its own karma. I was turned back by raging creeks last year. One time we tried it on bikes. The rain, fog, mosquitoes, creek crossings and dragging our bikes over a fresh landslide left my son describing it as Type 3 fun: not fun at the time, and not fun in retrospect either.
However, he hasn’t forgotten the experience.
Yukon summers are so short, visiting friends are a great excuse to do a great Yukon trip of your own. Or, if you really dread the arrival of the in-laws, you could even book a six-day solo trip on the Cottonwood for your own bucket list.
Keith Halliday is a Yukon economist and the winner of the Canadian Community Newspaper Award for Outstanding Columnist. The audiobook version of his most recent book Moonshadows, a Yukon-noir thriller, has just been released.
