Laughing helps. It’s like jogging on the inside.
On the Road Again…
One instructor we had told us there was no such thing as a dumb question and I thought he was right, till these tales, all allegedly true, came to hand. They forced second thoughts.
1) Walking through a mountain valley strewn with flowers and rocks, a lady asked the guide, “How did all these rocks get here?”
“They were brought down by a glacier,” he said.
She looked up the valley and said, “But I don’t see any glacier.”
“Oh, I guess it’s gone back for more rocks.”
2) Then there was the lady in Dawson City, who, after watching a slide show about winter in Dawson, asked, “What do you do with the ice bridge in the summer?”
3) Or the young man at Peggy’s Cove, Nova Scotia. “Do you deflate the rocks and take them inside in winter?”
4) She moved to Washington state, and soon joined some new friends on a trip to nearby Vancouver, her first trip outside the United States.
At the border, a guard asked how long they were staying in Canada. Knowing it would be after midnight, she asked, “How late will we be able to get back across the border?”
“Any time, Ma’am,” the guard said. “We never close Canada.”
Man is the only animal that laughs — or needs to.
Driving here ‘n there…
• A car was involved in an accident in a street. As expected, a large crowd gathered. A newspaper reporter, eager to get the story could not get near the car.
Being a clever sort, he began shouting loudly, “Let me through! Let me through! I am the son of the victim.”
The crowd made way for him.
Lying in front of the car was a donkey.
• A policeman spots a woman driving and knitting at the same time. Driving up beside her, he shouts out the window…“Pull over!”
“No,” she shouts back, “a pair of socks!”
• Then, there’s the fellow driving slowly down a country road on a fine sunny afternoon, feeling pretty good about life and the world.
A car approaches from the other direction, and as they pass, he gives a friendly wave, and the woman driving hollers out her open window, “Pig!”
“Boy, that kills the myth about friendly country folk,” he thought as he leaned out, looked back and hollered at her, “Witch!”
That’s when he hit the pig.
People who do not know how to laugh are always pompous and conceited. (W. Thackeray)
Don’t mess with ladies, even when parked…
Two brawny men came to her house to install new lino in the kitchen. They moved the stove and refrigerator aside and the job was done in a jiffy.
They left the stove and fridge where they were, gathered their tools and were about to leave, so naturally she asked them to put them back.
“That’s $45 extra” one said, “it’s not in our contract.”
Reluctantly, she paid them and they left.
The doorbell rang in a couple of minutes.
“Your car is behind our van; we can’t get out.”
She told them her fee to move it was $45.
Laughter is, after speech, the chief thing that holds society together.
A tip of the hat to those who are able to sort out the wisdom of the past, put it together with the wisdom of today and have a smile on the way.
As Richard Needham wrote in ’85,“They are the people who know that rejecting things because they are old fashioned would rule out the sun, the moon, and a mother’s love.”
Cowboy Bill’s thought may help along the road too: Nature gave us two ends: one to sit on and one to think with. How you end up depends which end we use most.