Get Out!

Hell hounds on the trail In the eyes of much of the world, the Yukon Quest is the only thing that differentiates modern Yukon from 19th-century Yukon, which is strange considering that dog propulsion long-ago lost favour in...

Hell hounds on the trail

In the eyes of much of the world, the Yukon Quest is the only thing that differentiates modern Yukon from 19th-century Yukon, which is strange considering that dog propulsion long-ago lost favour in any kind of industrial sense.

On Saturday at precisely noon, quickly cure your Frostbite hangover with a glass of raw eggs and Tabasco and make your way down to First Avenue to watch the awesome spectacle of 400 hysterical dogs unknowingly preparing to embark on the journey of a lifetime.

With four-time winner Lance Mackey waiting out this year’s Quest, it’s anybody’s game. Catch the News’ intensive race-long coverage.

Mental and emotional

stability is for jerks

It’s been at least a few days since a bunch of German cubicle workers swarmed the territory to do something “extreme.”

That’s why it’s time for the Yukon Arctic Ultra, a 692-kilometre marathon starting along the trail of the Yukon Quest. Participants may mountain bike, run, cross country ski or skijor (like dog sledding, but without the sled). Whatever their discipline, stepping in dog feces is highly likely.

Of course, excrement may be the least of their concerns.

In 2007, the marathon needed to be halted early because of temperatures plunging below minus 76, causing unsubstantiated reports of some participants losing fingers and hands. And toes and feet. And legs. And ears…

Fun fact: minus 76 degrees Celsius is the same temperature as the lowest ever recorded by NASA’s Mars-based Pathfinder lander. Not bad considering that Mars is 100 million kilometres further from the sun.

Portly folk welcome

If you like to hang out on beaches, you can sculpt sand for a living. If you hate feeling your toes, you can do the same thing with snow.

Already, Whitehorse has begun to welcome elite members of the latter group for the Rendezvous snow sculpture competition. The medium is in peak supply, but it needs to be stepped on for a while to make it better, just like Wendel Clark.

On Sunday, Monday and Tuesday from 8 p.m. to 11 p.m., show up at Shipyards Park with boots, and watch as massive boxes are gradually filled with snow from front-end loaders. Your job will be to stamp continuously on the seemingly unending torrents of snow.

“It should be a great workout,” promises organizer Sheila Dodd.

Get bitten

Over the weekend, Yukon College and the Yukon Arts Centre will magically transform into a citadel of performing arts. We may be a tiny, insignificant town surrounded by naught but trees and mountains, but every year some cosmic clerical error allows the snow-capped citizens of Whitehorse to cast off their winter slumber in a three-day orgy of ridiculously high-quality music.

It may be a bit too early to pretend that the end of winter in nigh, but Frostbite only comes once a year, and with the likes of Wax Mannequin, the Amos Garrett Trio and country performer Lori Yates, can you really afford not to go?

(Read the News’ feature story on Frostbite on page 37.)

Like little Stradivariuses

Frostbite musicians may be able to bring down the house with their fancy factory-made instruments, but in these times of economic crisis it’s high time we returned to exploring the acoustic properties of coffee cans and wooden dowling.

From 1 to 4 p.m. on Sunday at the Yukon Arts Centre public gallery, bring the wee ones and watch as they get glue up to their elbows and craft a symphony of instruments out of purely recycled materials.

For more information contact Jessica Vellenga at 393-7109.

High production

value, nipples

It isn’t Rendezvous unless you’ve somehow managed to see breasts at a Whitehorse bar. Breasts, schmeasts, you have not lived until you have sampled the sweet sounds and sights of raw, unfettered burlesque.

Mounting the stage of Coasters starting this Thursday are the women of Vancouver-based Sweet Soul Burlesque.

Seriousness is for the clothed and prudish. The essence of burlesque is delving into human sexuality with a confidence and playfulness that can only come from a mastery of all things lacy, sparkly and sequined – with a bit of leather just for fun.

Dancer Cara Milk “can whip off a bustier one-handed while spinning multiple hula hoops.”

Miss Cherry on Top, “everyone’s favourite topping,” can do roundhouse kicks in high heels.

Roundly praised by the Georgia Straight, the Globe and Mail and their hundreds of Whitehorse-based followers, catch the girls of Sweet Soul on Thursday, February 19th, Friday, February 20th and Saturday, February 21st.

Low production

value, Howie Miller

It isn’t Rendezvous unless you’re watching an aboriginal comedian.

Renowned Canadian comedian Howie Miller will hit Coaster’s Wednesday night stage, preceded by the usual suspects of the Whitehorse comedy scene.

The holiday name-giving guy

was probably in the john

Canadian bureaucratic politically correct mediocracy has a day, and that day’s name is Family Day, Ontario’s February statutory holiday.

Due to a change in the province’s employment standards act, the minimum number of public holidays recently increased from eight to nine, prompting the need to quickly cobble together a new holiday.

Honouring a historical figure, an event or even a basic concept was apparently too controversial, leaving humanity’s most basic form of social organization as the day’s only logical theme.

Lots of heart, not so

much equipment

The Arctic Sports and Dene Games have unknown origins, with some saying the games date back to the 19th century, making them older than the modern Olympics. For more than 100 years, the games have represented an event near-unrivalled in their focus on tests of pure strength and endurance.

In the one-arm reach, participants must balance on one arm and reach above their head with their other arm to touch a suspended target.

The head pull sees two athletes face each other on the ground in a lay-down position. The two athletes are then joined at the head by a band, and must attempt to pull the band off their opponent’s head through sheer strength. The one-foot high kick, the two-foot high kick are equally epic feats of individual fortitude.

February 14 and 15 starting at 9 a.m. at the Elijah Smith Elementary School.

For more information call 668-2840.

Caution: spoken words

Founder and Director of the Native Youth Sexual Health Network Jessica Yee will be hosting a “feisty, inspiring and women-friendly” spoken word night at the l’Association franco-yukonaise on Saturday at 5 p.m.

Touching on subjects ranging from colonization to communities of colour to sexuality, content may not be child friendly, but a child’s play space will be available.

Admission is free.

Got an event listing for Get Out!? Contact Tristin Hopper at